Day Twenty-Four: Family Dynamic

#24 Describe Your Family Dynamic of Your Childhood vs Your Family Dynamic Now

 {back row}: My Mom's brother (my Uncle Steve) holding my cousin Paul, my Mom holding me, My Dad, his Mom (my Grandmama), and my Mom's Mom (my Grannie).

{front row}: my cousin Christopher, and my brother Eric

When I think about the family dynamic of my childhood, and how it compares to the dynamic  of my own family, it's actually pretty similar. This was a photo taken when I was around a year old. For starters, my Mom has an older brother that is two years older than her. This is the same with my brother and me, and Ryder is the older brother to Brynley, except they are three years apart. My Dad was an only child, so we didn't have any cousins on his side, all but his 2nd and 3rd cousins. This is the same for my children, because Scot is an only child which means that the only cousins my kids will have is if my older brother and his wife ever decide to have children of their own.

Growing up, my grandmothers were very much a part of my life, yet they were both widows many years before either of the grandchildren were born so unfortunately we never had the chance to meet either of my Grandfathers. This always made me a little sad, but I realized I was still lucky to hve both grandmothers. When I met Scot, both sets of his Grandfathers were still alive, and his Mom's mother was too, so I loved the chance to meet them all. Our children are very lucky in the fact that they have both sets of both Grandparents and there is plenty of love to go around. My Grandmama and Grannie were actually very close, and loved one another, which I only wish my Mother in Law felt this way towards all of my family. I know it can be hard to celebrate holidays and birthdays all together, but in some cases that's just what you do. I do realize now that part of the reason I remember having such great times at the holidays was being with all of my family, on both sides.

I will say that although my relationship with my Dad has changed over the years, I do and always will love him. It just makes me wish that he had wanted to make the marriage work with my Mom, and set a better example for his children. In comparison with my own husband, Scot really doesn't compare because I know his heart and I know that he would never have it in him to ever cheat. I also know already, even though he has only been a father for three years, that he is so much more involved in our kids lives than my own Dad was (and is). This is sad, and it sucks, but that's just life. I'm just blessed to be married to him and I love his sweet, generous characteristics that make him such an ideal husband for me. I don't think there's another man that could love his children as much as he does! It just melts my heart to see him the way he interacts with our babies and I love him even more for this than the day I married him. Even now, when I talk to my Dad, we don't have nearly the relationship that I have with my Mom, and I pray that one day when my kids are older that I will have a great relationship where they can confide in me about anything.

My Mom did get remarried when I was about 16 or 17, so talk about hard times! I was a moody teenager and at the age where I needed a Father figure the most. My stepdad is so nice, but he will just never be my own biologial father who I see myself in. Again, it sucks, but that is life and I have learned to deal with my parents divorce and pray it never happens to Scot and I. I want to be married until death do us part, but only God knows what our future holds.

My Mom loves her grandbabies so so much, and she is the greatest when it comes to watching them overnight to give Scot and I much needed rest! I hope to continue this as my own children have kids one day. Gosh I can't even think that far ahead because I just can't imagine that just yet ha! But I have learned all about being a Mom, from one of the best! I love my Mom so much and she is so gentle and kind, and supportive of everything I do. She is my shoulder to lean on and cry on at times and I love that I too have a daughter of my own to go shopping with and get pedicures.

So this is my family dynamic now, and I love that I'm the third generation of women that have had a son and then a daughter, and a family of four. I just can't see us with any more children and I have plenty of love for the two that I have. I can't wait to see what lies ahead for Ryder and Brynley and if they will choose to have kis of their own one day or not.

What does your family dynamic look like?